Beside Me Always
by Usami
Summary: Yami is afraid of how he feels for Yugi, and pushes him away. But will he overcome his fear in time to save his light?


**Beside Me Always**

The darkness surrounded Yami on all sides. But he was used to it, after being in the puzzle for so long. It didn't bother him as much as it used to, when Yugi first assembled the puzzle.

Yugi. His thoughts trailed back to his little counterpart. "Why?" he asked aloud, his voice carried away by the emptiness. "Why is he always haunting me?" Rubbing his forehead, he tried to forget the face of his other self, only in vain. It lingered in his mind, the innocent, violet eyes that rivaled his own fierce, mauve pupils. The cheerful, childlike smile that graced his lips. Always a smile on the young boy's face.

Yami lay in the darkness, a strange feeling swelling inside of him. He had never felt anything like it before. Settling inside him was a sense of calm, of contentment, and at the same time, frightened him to the depths of his soul. "How is that possible?" he wondered. "What is this I'm feeling? I don't understand."

The confusion clashed inside of him, as if his mind and heart were at war with each other. He couldn't begin to fathom, even a little bit, of what any of it all meant. His soul felt as if tugged in two directions, unsure of which to choose. Unsure of where to go, of what to do.

A soft, young voice called out to Yami. Yugi was trying to communicate with him. Should he accept? He wasn't sure. Should the link between them reopen, for that moment at least? He wanted to hear the angelic tone of his little companion again, for they haven't spoken to each other in days.

But the feeling of confusion overtook him again, his heart and mind pulling his soul in opposite directions. There were so many things he needed to sort out first, and Yugi would just be a distraction at this point. He couldn't open up, not yet, until he understood better the feeling deep within him.

The link between them remained closed.

* * *

Yugi persisted to call to the spirit within the Millennium Puzzle, but his requests for communication between them continued to go unanswered. Sighing, he gave up, and continued down the street to his home. It has been so long since the little one had heard the guiding, confident voice of his Yami. He felt lonely without talking to him, which seemed silly when he could talk to all his friends, or his grandfather. But it was true. Yugi felt lonely without the spirit to talk to. He couldn't understand why Yami wouldn't open up with him anymore.

There was something wrong. He could feel it. But Yami refused to talk with him, and he had no way of ever finding out what was bothering his counterpart. However, he could feel Yami's confusion, his uncertainty, and wonderings.

Yet there were also other feelings rising inside of him; happiness, contentment, calm, understanding, joy. Yugi knew that feeling well, a common feeling between him and his grandfather, or him and his friends. The love he shared with all of them was very precious to him, and it always kept him going through the hardest times. He felt the same way for his Yami, looking up to him as the brother he never had, as he did to Honda, to Jounouchi. They were very dear to him, and he loved them so much.

He wanted to share this with his Yami, but the spirit seemed to push away from him. Yet the fact remained, Yami was feeling the same way towards him as he was towards Yami. He loved his guiding spirit as much as he loved his grandfather, and his friends. So then why did Yami insist on keeping away? It didn't make any sense.

It was as if a part of him was missing, that a piece of himself was away with Yami. He knew that as long as the ancient spirit remained distant from him, Yugi would never feel the space filled. He knew that Yami would always be with him, in the Millennium Puzzle, but if they weren't communicating, it was the same as if they were in different parts of the world. He realized how much he longed to talk to the spirit within him, but the link between them could only be opened if that was the desire of both of them.

'So hurry back, Yami,' he thought, reaching the Turtle Game Shop. 'I don't know why you won't talk to me about it, but if that's what you want, I won't stop you. Just hurry back. I miss you.'

* * *

Yami felt a pang in his heart, spreading throughout his body. "What was that?" he said, opening his eyes for the first in such a long time. It was just as dark as always, eyes closed or no. But the pain inside remained, for a little while only, and was gone as sudden as it had come.

Placing a hand to his chest, he felt his beating heart, threatening to rip from his chest. The confusion swept over him once again, drowning him under its currents. On one hand, he knew Yugi wanted to talk to him, and he wanted to speak to his light side. On the other, he needed to sort through all of the things in his mind, and talking with Yugi would only complicate the feelings more.

Still, the thought of Yugi's disappointment of not hearing from him seemed to break Yami's heart. He could feel the young boy's desire to communicate, corresponding with his own, and the sadness in his soul when his pleas went unreturned. But what could he do? He wasn't ready to speak of anything yet, and Yugi would have to understand that. Still, he felt rather guilty about it. . .

He shook his head, clearing out any and all thoughts that loitered. His body, and his soul, floated in the darkness, surrounded by emptiness.

* * *

"Yugi?" Jounouchi said, waving his hand in front of his small friend's face. "Yugi? Hello? Anyone there?"

Yugi blinked, his mind returning from its wanderings. He looked at Jounouchi. "Huh?" he asked.

"Ya spaced out again, Yug. What's up?"

The small boy sighed, resting his chin on his knuckles. "It's just that. . . I don't know."

The sandy-haired teen scratched his head. "Come on, Yug. There's something wrong. There's no point in hiding it."

No, Yugi didn't want to hide it. He didn't want to be like his Yami, who didn't reveal what he was feeling and why.

He inhaled deeply. "It's Yami," he said hesitantly.

"What about him?"

"He's. . . I don't know. . . hiding something from me."

Jounouchi's confusion was clearly visible on his face. Yugi tried again. "It's like, he's keeping something from me, and he won't tell me what's bothering him.

"We haven't talked in a while, because he keeps the connection between us closed. I just wish I knew what was wrong with him."

"Well. . ." Jounouchi scratched his head again. He understood what Yugi was saying, but wasn't sure how to comment about it, seeing as he had no Yami of his own. "Maybe you should just let Yami alone for a while, so he can sort through whatever is going on in his head," he replied.

The small boy nodded. "I know I should," he said, "but I just can't help but miss talking to him. Especially now, since Grandpa's going away for a week, and Honda, Anzu, and Bakura are out of town for their vacation."

"Yeah, but ya got me."

"I know. But when you're not around, the only other person is Yami, and if he's not talking to me for whatever reason, I'll feel a bit lonely."

"So what do you think is wrong with him?"

Yugi shrugged. "I don't know. But he seems really confused."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

A breeze fluttered by, tousling their hair. Yugi lay back, feeling the grass under him, looking up at the blue sky. 'Yami,' the small boy thought. 'Why won't you talk to me? What's wrong?'

* * *

The imploring of his young light was getting stronger. It was hard for Yami to ignore him, but he wasn't ready to face Yugi, not yet. He needed time to sort these feelings out. However, the beckoning of his counterpart was stronger than ever. He could endure it no longer.

He felt that Yugi was alone, back home in the game shop. Now was as good a time as ever.

Around him, the darkness began to disappear, replaced by illuminating light, consuming him entirely. Closing his eyes, Yami felt himself being transferred somewhere. His feet were suddenly on solid ground, and he felt the force of gravity upon him. As the glow subdued, he opened his eyes, looking at his young charge sitting on the bed.

Yugi was surprised by Yami's sudden appearance. They hadn't talked to each other in days, and now his guiding spirit was standing before him. The expression of disbelief quickly changed to one of joy as he jumped up off the bed, embracing his other in a tight hug.

Yami was nearly knocked off his feet by the small boy's unexpected action, figuratively and literally. He heard the young one sigh happily, and he felt a smile develop on his lips. But a sudden uncomfortable feeling rested upon his shoulders, causing him to push Yugi away from him.

Yugi looked up at the face of the ancient spirit, noticing how his eyes seemed so sad and distracted. "What's wrong?" he asked.

The innocence in his voice played upon Yami's ears, the gentleness rousing his soul. His youthful eyes showed concern and wonder. He couldn't help but smile at his young light.

"Nothing," he said softly, ruffling the small boy's tricolor hair. He walked over to the bed, feeling exhausted. Almost as if he couldn't stand any longer. He sat on the edge of the bed, looking at the floor.

Yami felt the bed sink underneath the weight of Yugi as he seated himself next to him. The silence between them was deafening, lasting for what seemed like an eternity.

"Yami?" The stillness was shattered. The spirit looked his way.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Um. . . I was just wondering. . . why haven't you. . . I mean, why don't you. . . uh. . ." He shifted uncomfortably.

"What?"

"I was just wondering why you don't talk with me anymore."

Yami sighed. "I just need some time to myself, Hikari," he said. He wasn't sure what else to say. Burdening his problems on the young child was the last thing he wanted to do.

But Yugi wanted to find out whatever his Yami seemed to be hiding. "But, there's something wrong. I know it. There's something you're not telling me."

Yami glanced at him, his eyes flashed with determination. Looking away, he simply said, "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing!" the young boy exclaimed, causing the ancient being to peer at the boy, surprised. "I don't understand why you won't tell me that something's wrong, when I know there's something bothering you."

"I don't feel like talking about it at the moment."

"So, when do you plan on talking about it? I might be able to help you."

"How?"

"I don't know. But, if you tell me what's bothering you, I'd probably get a better idea."

Yami lay back on the bed, feeling it sink under him. "I don't think so," he said.

"Why not?" Yugi questioned.

"You wouldn't understand it."

"What wouldn't I understand?"

"This feeling, inside my body and soul, it scares me to my very core, yet at the same time. . ."

"You feel more alive? Better than you were before?" Yami sat up, looking at the little teen. "Like, maybe, more complete?"

"How did. . . ?"

"I feel the same way all the time." A peaceful smile adorned Yugi's childish face. "When I'm with my friends, or with Grandpa, or with you. Not scared, and I don't understand why you feel scared, but I feel happier, and so much better around you and them, I feel safer. I feel more at peace, like nothing could ever be better."

Yami continued to look at his counterpart, contemplating about the young boy's words. Embarrassed for talking so deeply, and that his dark side's gaze was fixed on him, a thin, scarlet strip appeared on Yugi's face. Confused, the spirit blinked, then realized the cause for his young associate's flush, and averted his stare.

Yugi rubbed the back of his head sheepishly, looking down. "Yeah," he said awkwardly. A sense of quiet settled in the room, covering both of them. After a while, Yami shook his head, pushing away his thoughts. He didn't want to think or discuss this topic anymore.

He stood, Yugi looking up at him. "So, I'm guessing you don't want to talk about it then?" he asked in a small voice.

"No," the dark one said bluntly. "I don't wish to hear about this subject any further."

"Why? Why do you keep trying to hide how you feel? Why are you afraid of it?"

"I don't know." He turned around swiftly, his eyes locked with his young other. "I just don't want to talk about it anymore."

"But. . ."

He held up his hand, silencing the young boy. "Yugi," he said, his tone quiet yet clear. "I don't wish to discuss this matter. Understood?"

Yugi could only nod. Yami sighed, rubbing his temples. The Millennium Puzzle blazed brightly, and the small one watched as his Yami disappeared into the artifact. The light diminished, and Yugi was all alone in his sleeping quarters.

Holding the Sennen Puzzle close to his heart, a thin haze of tears formed in his eyes. "Why, Yami?" he whispered. "What are you afraid of?"

* * *

It was strange for Yami. This feeling. How could you explain this? How does one explain feeling love and fear at the same time? He knew it was love he was feeling, love towards his young light, as a parent would their own child. But how would someone explain the fear that came along with it? Why was he afraid of this?

It was so new to him. All of it was. He didn't understand. Was it possible for someone to feel two emotions at the same time?

He heard the pleading of Yugi reach out to him, cutting through his own thoughts. The young boy's cries were full of sorrow, a sense of guilt consuming Yami's heart. Yet he remained in the puzzle. He didn't open the link between them, he didn't want to at the moment. He needed to be alone to think about these feelings whirling through him.

Talking with Yugi didn't help him understand about the feelings within him. Then again, he didn't exactly share much for Yugi to help him with anyway. Yami recalled how the young boy looked before he departed a few days beforehand. He had a look in his eyes that would break anyone's heart. It hurt Yami so to see his little counterpart that way. So then why was he trying to avoid the little one?

Why was it so hard for him to admit what he was feeling? Why did he feel afraid of the bond that he and his light side shared? What was wrong?

The child's begging for communication between them continued, and the Yami's disregarding persisted as well.

* * *

Yugi lay on his side, curled into a ball. He felt the bed underneath him, yet felt nothing at all. The empty void in his heart spread throughout his spirit, engulfing any feelings or thoughts. He saw, felt, heard nothing. Just nothingness.

And still the pain from that ripped at his mind, coursing through him, tangling him inside. A tear fell from his violet eyes, which were dulled by his grief. 'Yami?' he called vainly to his dark side in the Sennen Puzzle. Nothing. 'Yami. . .' More tears tainted the bed sheets, as the young boy tried to stifle his sobs.

Rain pounded on the roof, their rhythmic pattern interrupted only by the occasional roar of thunder. A flash of lightning tore through the gray sky. Yugi pulled his knees closer to his chest.

His eyes slowly opened, greeted by the Millennium Puzzle that lay a few centimeters away from him. Gripping it in his hands, the small teen sat up, his back resting against the wall. Lifeless and cold, the gold pieces of the artifact glittered dimly. Yugi rubbed his eyes with his sleeve, removing any tears that had remained. He secured the puzzle around his neck.

A crash downstairs disrupted his thoughts. 'What was that?' he wondered, scooting to the edge of the bed. Pushing himself away from the bed, he quietly opened his door and proceeded down the stairs.

He gasped, seeing a huge mess in the kitchen. The table and chairs were knocked over, drawers were opened, plates were shattered, silverware scattered everywhere.

There was another crash, coming from the den. As silent as he could, he walked towards the den, peeking around the corner. Two men, dressed in black, were searching around for things worth stealing. One of the men opened a drawer, pulling something out, then tossed it aside. The item hit the wall, falling to the floor.

"What have we here?" a voice rasped behind him. He turned around, looking up at a huge man standing before him. It was too dark to make out much, but Yugi could see the man's hard, brown eyes very clearly.

The man shoved Yugi out from his hiding place, and the boy landed on the ground with a thud. The other two looked up to see their boss grabbing the small teen by his arm, roughly pulling him up.

"Let me go!" he cried out, trying to yank his arm free. But the man's grip was too strong for him to break away from.

Lifting the boy off the ground, the man watched as he struggled. "I didn't think anyone was here," the boss said. "What are you doing here all by yourself, kid?"

"I live here! Now let me go!" Yugi tried to kick the guy in the torso, but his heavy build protected him from the young boy's attack. As he tried again, the man grabbed Yugi's foot and threw him to the opposite side in the room. He hit the wall, and fell, landing on the couch.

Rubbing his head, he looked up to see the three men crowding around him, one with a rope in his hands. His cries for help were drowned out by the booming thunder.

* * *

A surge of alarm coursed through Yami, breaking through the dam of his mind and flowing all over his body, causing him to tremble slightly. It stopped abruptly, leaving the spirit to wonder.

"What happened?" he said aloud. "That. . . feeling. It was. . ." He rubbed his forehead. It was such a powerful feeling, and his body still quivered a little from the effects. Closing his eyes, he felt for his little counterpart, reopening the link between them for the first time in days, trying to find out what was happening.

Nothing. He received nothing. He opened his eyes, surprised that the young boy wasn't jumping at the chance to talk to him. Usually, it was Yugi trying to reopen the link, waiting to see if Yami would speak. Now, the link remained closed because of the light side. Yami didn't understand.

That's when the sense of urgency rushed through him again, as he grasped at the fact that something was wrong. Yugi was in some sort of danger, no longer in possession of the Millennium Puzzle. He clenched his fist, realizing that by preventing their mental connection to open he couldn't tell that Yugi was in trouble until it was too late.

"I'd never forgive myself if anything happened to him," he muttered. A strange sense settled on him then, as soon as those words left his lips. They hung around him, passing through his mind. There was something about those words. . .

The recognition struck him suddenly. So that was the reason? That was why he was so afraid? It made some sense, and yet still confused him. The reason he was so afraid was because that. . . ?

Yami couldn't ponder about that right now. His young light was in peril, and he had to do something about it.

Trying to discover what was going on, he closed his eyes, attempting to explore what has happening around the Millennium Puzzle. To find out what was happening to Yugi.

* * *

Yugi continued to struggle against the ropes, trying to break free, with no success. He had been taken back to the thieves' hideout, where more of them were gathered. He had been tied to a chair, the Sennen Puzzle taken away from him. The gang of robbers was examining the gold artifact, discussing how much it would be worth.

The ropes began to cut at his skin. He groaned, then limply rested against the chair. 'The ropes are too tight,' he thought. His wrists were throbbing with pain, but he tried to loosen his bonds once again. However, the more he struggled, the tighter the ropes seemed to become.

The bonds were beginning to burn, and he had stop trying. He looked up to see the thieves, who were still examining the pyramid. 'What am I thinking?' he wondered. 'Even if I do get free, how would I sneak out? There is so many of them, and if I try to escape, they would catch me for sure. Plus, they're all twice my size, if not more than that.'

There was a flare of lightning, followed by the deafening sound of thunder. Suddenly, everything went black. The power had gone out.

A spark of light became visible as one of the thieves turned on a flashlight. He motioned for the others to follow him, and they all got up and left, leaving Yugi alone in the dark.

Closing his eyes, his head leaned against the chair. He tried his best to keep the tears in. 'What's going to happen to me?'

A flicker across from him jolted him out of his thoughts. On the table lay the Millennium Puzzle, a soft glow coming forth. Suddenly, Yami stood there, picking up the artifact and wearing it around his neck. It continued to shine, repelling the darkness around him and his light side.

He stared into the child's frightened eyes. Yami couldn't help but feel guilty about the young teen's predicament. If he had allowed the connection to open, he could have helped his counterpart sooner.

Yet upon seeing his Yami, the joyful light that the dark spirit knew glimmered and burned in the small child's eyes, a smile appearing on Yugi's face. Yami placed a finger to his lips, and the young boy nodded as his other walked behind him, the Sennen Puzzle glowing faintly.

Kneeling down, the ancient spirit reached out to untie the ropes that held his young light, when he noticed they were tinted a mild red, still slightly damp. A painful sting ripped through his soul, as he examined the teen's wrists, making out some deep cuts. He quickly tried to undo the tight knot.

Unexpectedly, the lights wavered, then flashed on. Both looked up, as all the power returned. Yami went back to the task at hand, knowing that the thieves would come back soon. But the ropes were too tight, and Yugi's struggling had only made them tighter against him.

The door swung open, and some of the thieves walked in, surprised at what they saw. Yami, knowing that there was no point in hiding, stood up, his stare piercing through all of them. They cringed unwillingly, but then charged in his direction.

Yami simply walked in front of Yugi, waiting for their attacks. When one was close enough, he tried to punch the spirit in the face. Yami ducked, as his fist connected with the man's stomach. The thief doubled over in pain. The others stopped, staring at their fallen comrade.

Taking advantage of their distraction, Yami punched the nearest one in the face, causing him to fall on top of the one behind him. Another tried to strike his face, but he caught his fist, bringing his knee up to the thief's nether region. Yami then roughly shoved the pained man out of his way. He felt the anger burn within him, as he continued to overcome the thieves one by one. Just the thought of them even thinking of hurting his young light rekindled his rage, until he had finished off the last crook.

A call from behind him caused Yami to turn around. Standing behind Yugi was the boss of the thieves, holding a gun to the small boy's head. "If ya don't want the kid hurt," he said, pushing the tip of the gun closer to Yugi's head, "then you'll do as I say."

Yami clenched his fists, but what could he do? As long as Yugi was in trouble, he had to help, even if it meant giving up. He couldn't risk his counterpart getting shot. His hands returned to his sides, his head hung defeated.

"That's better." The spirit hissed through his teeth, but said nothing. Noting that the gold puzzle was around his neck, the boss then said, "Hand over the pyramid."

Removing it, Yami tossed it towards him, and he caught it with his free hand. Behind him, two thieves grabbed his wrists, holding them behind his back, and harshly thrusting him on his knees. The boss placed the artifact on the table, then walked over to Yami, pointing the gun at the spirit. Yami thought of retreating in the Millennium Item, but he didn't want to abandon his light side. Then again, he was no use to Yugi dead.

The boss was about to pull the trigger, when something hit his back, causing him to drop the gun. The chair clattered onto the ground. Staggering forward, the head thief steadied himself and turned around to see Yugi standing there, his eyes filled with determination.

Even Yami was surprised to see the child free from his bonds. The young boy ran to the table, grabbing the Millennium Puzzle. The boss tried to take it away from him, but Yugi side-stepped away, and the guy fell forward. He ran towards Yami, barely avoiding other thieves trying to get him. The two holding the spirit let him go, trying to catch the teen, but he evaded them, and they hit the ground. Wordlessly, he handed the puzzle to his dark side, then looked to his side and ran swiftly, and fearfully, away, as another thief began to chase him.

Confused, Yami wore the gold pyramid around his neck, wondering why Yugi would give it to him instead of wearing it himself. He could only assume that the young boy wanted it to protect his counterpart, just in case. But if Yami was being protected by the Millennium Puzzle, what about Yugi?

A cry of pain brought Yami back to reality. He looked up to see Yugi on the ground, the boss standing over him, a bat in his hand. The big guy looked at Yami and sneered, pulling a gun from his pocket. Infuriated, Yami stood, dashing towards him. Before the crook could react, the dark spirit snatched both gun and bat from his hand. He jabbed the boss in the stomach with the bat, and the guy bent over in pain. Yami struck him across the face, and he fell to the ground limply. Yami tossed the bat and gun aside.

He turned around, bending down to check on the child. He had been knocked out, his slit wrists staining the floor. Some tears dotted the ground, as Yami cradled the boy in his arms. "I'm sorry," he whispered. Rising, he decided to call the police as soon as possible. They needed to find the robbers before they awoke. Then, he would have to take the young teen home.

* * *

Groaning, Yugi placed a hand to his forehead. 'Where am I?' he wondered. He felt his hand grasp a sheet, and a pillow under his head. Opening his eyes, he discovered that he was in his room, lying in his bed. He looked at the nightstand next to his bed, seeing the Millennium Puzzle there next to his alarm clock. 9:39 AM, it read.

That was when the small boy noticed his Yami, sitting on the floor, his arms serving as a pillow under his head, which rested on the bed. Yugi tiled his head to the side, confused. 'Why did he stay here? He could have gone back in the puzzle.'

He attempted to sit up as slowly as he could, so as not to disturb the dark spirit. But Yami seemed to be on alert for the slightest movement, and arose as Yugi did.

Yami got up and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at his small counterpart. "Are you alright?" he asked.

Yugi simply nodded. "Of course I am," he answered, as if stating the obvious. "Why wouldn't I be?"

The dark side pointed to the boy's wrists, which were wrapped in bandages. Upon seeing them, he rubbed his wrist gingerly, only now feeling the pain of the cuts.

Yami hung his head. "I'm sorry," he said softly.

Yugi looked up at him, surprised. "Why?" he asked. "You didn't do anything."

"That's the whole point, Yugi. I didn't do anything. I should have been there to help you."

"But you didn't know."

"And it's because I kept the link between us closed. So I couldn't have known until it was too late."

"But once you found out, you did come to help me. That's how I was able to get free, because you loosened the ropes around my wrists."

Yami looked at his young light, his violet eyes blazed with concern. He looked away. "Still," the spirit said, "I should have been there to help you from the start. I should have left the connection open. There was no reason for me to be selfish, and push you away when you were only trying to help me."

"But you said you needed to think about your feelings by yourself, didn't you? You needed to sort them out first?"

"There was nothing to sort out, Hikari. I was scared, that was all."

"Why were you scared? I never understood that."

"I didn't either, until yesterday." He placed a hand on Yugi's head. "I was afraid of becoming too attached to you, of the bond between us. I was afraid that if something would happen to you, that I wouldn't be able to handle it. So I pushed you away, hoping that by keeping distance, should anything happen to you, or me, that either of us would be ready for it.

"But I know that wasn't the best way to handle that," he added, his hand falling to the bed. "And it wouldn't have worked, either. When I discovered you were in danger, I knew it wouldn't work."

Yugi pushed the blanket off his body, then wrapped his arms around his Yami's neck. The dark spirit was startled. This wasn't really a reaction he had expected from the young boy.

"I was never afraid of anything like that happening," Yugi whispered, "because I knew that we would always protect each other. People always help their loved ones."

Yami felt a smile grow on his lips, his arms encircling his young light. "I'm sorry for leaving you," he said.

Yugi gently pushed away from him, shaking his head. "You never left me," he said. "To me, you were always around. Just. . . a little lost. I wanted to help you, so you could find your way back."

Confused at first, the smile on the spirit's face returned. "Thank you." They embraced again, never wanting to leave their other.

'You never left, Yami,' the small boy thought. 'I knew you were always beside me. That's the way it's always going to be.'

**The End**


End file.
